We are unhappy to report that in the 2012 Summer Olympic events that matter to gentlemen, the United States of America is not faring well.
Sure, overall, America is only behind China in overall medal standings, but in the games in which gentlemen participate America is barely in the race.
So far, in equestrian, with two of six events down and in fencing, with three of five fencing events down, America has yet to medal (our gentle-ladies swept the individual sabre competition in ’08, but blanked it this year).
The good news: We have a silver in archery (of course with the #1 ranked archer in the world, Brady Ellison, on our team, we should have gold); there are a lot of rowing events to come, but so far only the ladies have scooped up a medal (a bronze); and we have a sporting chance at taking home some sailing medals.
But China basically owns badminton and Eastern Europe runs the modern pentathlon–a test to see who would make the best 19th Cenutury Cavalry Soldier–so forget about scooping up any medals there.
Have we lost our way? Or do these events matter? Which events do you think the Modern Gentleman should excel at?